What do I want…
My new – deliberate – role is as a creator.
The questions are abundant. I feel like the four year old boy standing in front of a six foot tall by twelve foot long shelving unit displaying thousands of Matchbox cars. There’s too many choices. Which one will be the coolest? Which one will go the fastest? Which one will I get the most enjoyment from? Oh my, what if I make the wrong decision?
You may snicker or balk at my dilemma, but if you, too, were given the freedom to do whatever whenever there’s a good chance overwhelm would strike. Am I doing the right thing? What would happen if…? Will something happen to my family while I’m away? How far is too far away? What will I do with my time? What do I drive? How do I get there? Where am I going? Seriously, what will I do with all this time?
I’ve witnessed the four year old boy spend twenty stressful minutes to decide on the perfect Matchbox car. The anxiety and stress evaporates as soon as we exit the store. By the time we get home, the newness of the new toy has worn off.
I know there’s no wrong decision. I am free to sit on my son’s sofa and wait for something to happen or I can explore the neighborhood until I can find the vehicle best suited for my adventure.
Life is full of choices; I’ll adapt. For now, I shall continue to learn how to wander.
In Honor Of You, John.
This spring we said good-bye to John, a dear friend and loving husband. His wife, Cheri, hosted an intimate gathering of friends – his family – at a his favorite spot near Lake Michigan. It was a lovely memorial ceremony that celebrated the love and friendship John extended to everyone.
This past Sunday evening six of us met on the side of the same dirt road and walked the trail to return to the sacred space along the creek. Eva set up her Tibetan Singing Bowls on a fleece blanket and we set up our folding chairs in front of her. It was John’s turn for a personalized session with the singing bowls.
You see, Eva’s been offering the Tibetan Singing Bowl healing concerts at Evolve Books & Gift Store (Glen Arbor) for years and each time John was offered the opportunity to lay surrounded by the bowls he would gift his turn to someone else. It was more important to him that everyone in attendance was provided with the chance to experience what it was like to be in the center of the sound waves. With a smile, he’d say, “Maybe next time.”
The vibrational tones of the bowls was beautifully accompanied by the background sounds of the creek and song birds. The resonating sound waves attracted additional flocks of birds to nearby trees. It was magical how the song of the bowls and nature were in perfect harmony. At the height of the performance, a blue heron flew from upriver past following the creek toward Lake Michigan. Truly, a divine sign of love and gratitude.
Click HERE To Listen
Along the way…
Leelanau County, Michigan
Pearl Of Wisdom
“How committed are you to holding onto the past – the disappointment felt?”
After journaling about my experience of being unworthy of salesman’s attention, my internal voice asked me, “How committed are you to holding onto the past? You know, the disappointment that you felt in that moment? What good came from that experience? Know he was not the person to do purchase from. Bless him. Forgive him. Dwell on that.”
After waiting for ten-plus minutes, I got in the car I am borrowing and drove away from yet another dealership. It wasn’t until this morning that the pearl of wisdom of knowing the annoyed-by-my-presence-salesman did not deserve my attention, money or business. I stated out loud, “I am worth good service. I am worth kindness and the time. I am worthy of good manners.”
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To Write. To Travel. To Explore.
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May your wanders be full of curiosity and wonder. I wish I could hug you in person.
Thank you, Peggy. Who knows, maybe I’ll be in your neighborhood someday soon.
I love the way you write. I feel as if I am right there with you, experiencing all of it. As someone who actually does have the freedom to choose what they want at any given moment on any given day, I can tell you that the most important lesson I’ve learned is this: you don’t have to DO something all the time to be who you really are. The days I close the laptop, open a book and let my mind wander to far away places, I’m still being me. So take your time exploring the neighborhood. Leave all that “adulting” for people who need that kind of stuff! Happy trails, my dear.
Thank you for the dear compliment, Barb. I’m trying to set aside the need to adult, but it’s been ingrained into my survival way of living. One day I will fully adjust. Until then, I shall continue to put pen to paper.
And the wandering how begun! I am looking forward to reading/seeing more of your adventures. And I am sending you a big hug!
Hugs to you as well, Jill. This is rather exciting; you know, to virtually take an audience with me. Thanks for joining me on this adventure.
Reading your post, I’m feeling inspired and I fear about to be bitten by the wander bug. Lovely post, Cindy, it has me thinking of what Dr Seuss said about the places we will go.